So You Think You Can Dance?

"Scandalous Thursdays!"

"Hi!  My name is Faith Margaret and I watch Scandal."  I enjoy it.  Thoroughly…and will blog  right here about all new episodes on Thursday nights beginning next week.  Oh!  Your theories about what is happening next in this suspenseful show are welcomed along with my musings.

There.  She.  Is.  Mama Pope is back looking all disheveled and diabolical.  “Thank you, baby!  Thank you for getting me outta there.”  Apparently she believes Olivia is on her team and will “handle” them.  Or nah.  Three The Hard Way (Olivia, Fitz & Jake) need Mama Pope to inform them what the hells is goings on with Daddy Pope but she ain’t having no parts of that.  Olivia tries to press the issue and Mama Pope is unfazed.  Doesn’t even flinch, really.  “You have a PhD in his crazy.”  I am going to save that for clever use when one of my good friends is crying and losing her damn mind over some cat that means her no damn good.  Mama Pope has good sense and advises her child to get her life, stop sleeping around with powerful men and get over her crazy daddy.  “Look around, Boo…”  Mama Pope is the cold one.  Daddy Pope is the loving one.  I, for one am ready to see the real showdown between Daddy and Mama Pope.   

Oh, Huck.  Poor Huck.  Little Huck saw his Daddy do a horrible thing to that pock-faced man and now there is nothing Huck can do about it.  Except maybe further traumatize his baby mama with B6-13 files that detail the horrible things that happened to him causing him to disappear.   I guess it could work...    

Command is distributing Kill Cards around town and cleaning house of B6-13 by knocking them off one by one?  That gross cat, Charlie makes my skin crawl and is carrying a Kill Card for Quinn. These two get to get throwin' ‘dem bows after some of that nasty bumping and grinding they like to partake in.  Must admit Quinn got mad squabbles, Yo and puts them paws on old Charlie.  But, c’mon, son!  Who the hell sits with their mortal enemy while nursing their wounds and catches up on family drama after a damn beat down?!?   Quinn is just so…random with her lust.  Always lurking around.  Ugh…I still do not like her and wish Shonda girl would get rid of her already and replace Harrison with another hot black man.  

Looks like O-Wishia has picked herself up, dusted herself off, adjusted her power suit and is ready to start all over again after the drama with her abusive ex husband.  She is always caught off guard in the Press Room at the White House.  The last to know e’ry damn thang!  Well...except for poor, poor David Rosen.  Just like last week and the week before that and the week before that, David has a big “L” for loser stamped on his forehead.  During his deposition of O-Wishia he gets to hear her say she was sleeping with that Leo Bergen cat.  Cue “Endless Love.”  Somebody give this cat some game, already.  *exasperated sigh*

All of Cyrus’ hot steamy and passionate love is in everyone’s living room for commentary, thanks to Ellen's Boo and the philandering Vice President.  That is a crisis the Presidency can’t afford right about now.  Pillow talk is something else, ain’t it?  Olivia figured the White House could get around that drama by Cyrus marrying the boy toy because everyone loves a good love story.  “I was in the closet for 40 years.  I only slept with 2 men.  One was the love of my life.  The other was a prostitute.”  Cyrus refuses to dishonor James’ memory by marrying the boy toy to avoid the scandal.  But he will quit instead.  “Damn! Damn!  Damn!”  Where is Florida Evans when you need her?  Forget Flo.  Summons Olivia to give Cyrus some straightenin’.  Olivia basically told Cyrus to put his big girl panties on, stop being a bitch baby and get back in the damn game!  I soooo want to have that kind of moment with somebody.  “Oh yeah, so you’re not a bitch baby?!?”  Love.  It.  Cyrus said, hell naw he ain't nobody's bitch baby but is one of the most powerful men in the world.  Just like that, he's back in the game.  That’s my man!!!

The Vice President has a fetish of sorts with the ladies, wouldn’t you say?  A signature move, huh?  Mellie smoothed played receiving that news off like a pro but she has got pissed off to the highest level of pissivity!  Fix that by telling old girl she better watch herself for STDs and get on the right team because her husband, the POTUS is the ticket to bet on.  Womp.  Womp.  Womp. 

Daddy Pope loves a good glass of red wine, don’t he?  He waits for Olivia at her dining room table with a damn Stevie Wonder album to start another of his masterful monologues.  Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Command...

“COULD YOU BE MORE UNGRATEFUL?!?  You're my flesh.  There would be NO Olivia Pope if not for me.  As difficult as it is to admit, I have failed as a father.  And it saddens me because I bled, toiled and allowed myself to be hated all for your protection.  All so you could believe that you are truly special.  But instead of gratitude I get scorn, ridicule, mockery and worst of all a daughter who sends in her clan of good old boys to kill me.  Your own blood.  Every.  Chance.  You.  Get.  It is your life that is sad.  It is you who cannot be normal.  It is you who has no comprehension of love.  So what?  Your stomach turns every time you look at me?  Well let me be the one to break it to you, Oliva.  You are simply looking in the mirror!”  He.  Ain’t  Neva.  Lied.  And Olivia thinks she has the guts to shoot her own father?!?  Girl, bye!  With a gun he easily laid down on the dining room table to tempt Olivia to take the kill shot when it first presented itself to her, their fate is sealed.  “Olivia.  Watch yourself."  Everybody knows what that means when your parent tells you that.  They.  Are.  Pissed.  "ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?  Are you kidding me?!?  You just shot you own father.  You just shot me.  Never, never in a million years did I think that you would be willing to pull the trigger.”  Olivia broke his heart with her willingness to kill him and in that moment I am certain Command aka Daddy Pope would never ever ever kill his child.  He loves her so and is steadfast in his commitment to give her the best life possible even while being the menacing shadow that lurks around the corners.  “No matter how hard you try to deny it.  You will miss me when I’m gone.”

I want that black shawl, robe thingie Olivia had on when she put Stevie Wonder on the record player.  The same album Daddy Pope lovingly referred to right before she tried to kill him.  Let me find out Kerry Washington can get down with the get down!  Go Jake!  Go Jake!  Go Jake!  Am I the only one that gets tickled watching white folks get their groove on?  You never know if they are going to delight you with soul that keeps them right on beat with everyone else or leave you wanting to turn the music off to offer a free class on staying on beat.  Bless their hearts.  I still don't understand why soul and rhythm aren't distributed evenly amongst all of us?  I digress.  Jake did alright for himself, though.  So, finally Olivia admits she wants Fitz AND she wants Jake AND she ain’t choosing.  Not today.  Not tomorrow.  Today it’s all about pleasing Olivia and she wants to be happy and free.  G A M E.

Lovemaking on the piano will have to wait for now, unfortunately.  The Vice President is playing hard ball and kidnapped Olivia to manipulate the nation's foreign policy to his liking.  What a waste of a good generous glass of red wine.  

Until January 29^th in the year of our Lord 2015, gladiators…

 

Side note:  If Joe Morton does not get an Emmy nod he better, dammit!

Side note to the side note:  I might just put that last black and white coat on my list for Santa.  I mean...I have been a good, good girl this year.  

We Can Always Go Home

It's still there.  I mean, not that I thought it wouldn't be.  But...it's still there. This is the last home my family shared some 30 years ago. My mother. My middle sister.  My baby sister. Her father.  My grandmother.  And me.  All six of us in that small 2 bedroom house owned by a man named, "Big Daddy" on the east side of town just beyond South Central, Los Angeles.  I was so happy when we moved into this house because my young and ever hopeful mind imagined we would be stable.  Finally!  No more moving from pillar to post because we couldn't make the rent.  Nuh uh...things were going to get better for us with this move.  I was too happy to invite friends over to visit because with this house I had no embarrassment about the paltry conditions of our home.  All the utilities were on.  We had a house phone (remember those) that rang all the time with calls from my friends for me. Every room was furnished. My baby sister and I even had our own beds.  Things were good!  Until they weren't. 

In the 7 months we lived at 5510 San Pablo there were some good times before things became difficult for us.  I remember coming home to the comforting aroma of red beans and rice (again) cooking on the stove.  Or the sound of fried chicken sizzling in a cast iron skillet and the smell wafting through the house causing me to ask again and again, "Time to eat, yet?"  Oh!  There was that time my friends and I snatched the sheet from under my baby sister while she slobbered away on her pillow, making her wet her pants she was so damn scared.  And that time I found $20 outside somewhere and was finally able to buy a "moo moo" from National's for my mother as her Mother's Day gift.  She cried.  I even remember the time my baby sister's father taught me how to iron a pair of pants within an inch of my life!  I still can press a pair of pants as good as any cleaners in town, too.    

But the memories that are seared in my consciousness as clear as day are much more sinister and depressing and sad that those glimpses of happy.  To be honest, during the entire 7 months we lived in that house I was mostly sad and afraid and confused and embarrassed.  Behind the securely closed and locked door and tightly shut windows covered with curtains, my adolescent mind worked overtime to make sense of the anger, intimidation, anxiety, sadness and fear that covered everything inside like a dense fog.  My mother struggled to find the motivation to actively participate in life without popping Valiums several times a day just to quiet her mind and dull the back spasms she endured.  My grandmother drowned her feelings of shame from running her answering service business at 819 Santee Street in downtown Los Angeles into the ground with can after can after can of Budweiser.  She and my mother would 'cuss each other out like they didn't even know one another during her drinking binges that seemed to happen every Friday like clockwork.  They would both awaken the next day as if nothing happened and we stepped around that tension in the house like it was a toy left behind by a child.  My baby sister's father controlled everything behind those doors with heavy hands he used to beat my mother into submission and mean and hurtful words he spewed with the full intention of crushing her spirit.  He was masterful.

Behind that door I was the parent that tended to my mother's busted lips, blackened eyes and battered and bruised limbs.  Behind that door I was the voice of reason that dressed my baby sisters, put my grandmother's car keys in my mother's hands and hurried us all out the door as my sister's father slept off his latest nasty and abusive mood.  And behind that door I was the one that tucked my sisters into bed when we returned a few hours later because my mother could not imagine her life…and ours…were worth more than the pitiful existence that was our reality in that home.  There was no time for me to be a kid behind the door of 5510 San Pablo.  And I absolutely hated that.        

We all left that house never to return in 1984 when my mother quickly succumbed to an addiction to "crack" cocaine that destroyed our fragile and dysfunctional, yet intact family within 4 short months.  My sisters and I went into foster care in separate placements that were a great distance from one another.  My baby sister's father vanished.  My mother and grandmother fed their addictions together roaming the streets of South Central and were ultimately not able to get my sisters and I out of foster care.  My baby sisters and I spent the remainder of our childhoods in foster care moving from placement to placement before exiting foster care upon our 18th birthdays.  And with all of that, 5510 San Pablo was the last home my sisters and I had as children.  

Everyone in my family struggled mightily as a result of our family circumstance.  Every.  Single.  One.  Of.  Us.  As far as I know my mother is still feeding her crack addiction 30 years later somewhere in South Central.  My grandmother suffered serious several debilitating strokes requiring total care while her mind deteriorated into dementia.  My baby sister's father died alone and very very sick from years of intravenous drug use.  And yet my sisters and I are still here today doing the best we can as adults that survived poverty, depression, drugs, domestic violence and utter chaos in our childhoods.  While my sisters still live in Los Angeles, I chose to create the life I wanted further away.  Rarely do I visit Los Angeles…for obvious reasons.  But a recent trip to Los Angeles to see about the most important person in my life forced me to go home.  

During my last day of this quick turn around trip to LA, without much thought I found myself driving towards 5510 San Pablo after 30 years.  I just needed to see it, you know?  To breathe it.  I made the block several times slowing down to take it all in as I got closer.  I was back home.  Alllll of those memories flooded my mind and my heart raced with the sheer overwhelm of it all.  Those same feelings of sadness and fear and confusion and embarrassment settled in my stomach just like when I lived in that home so many years ago.  I circled the block several times.  Slowly.  Again.  And.  Again.  Eventually, I slowed down long enough to snap a quick picture of 5510 San Pablo from the vantage point of the driver's seat of the rental car.  I pulled over and stared at the image and slowly the difficult feelings started to fade with the assurance that I am now in the driver's seat of my life.  I control what happens to me.  I choose what I allow to happen around me.  Looking at that picture affirmed for me that my sisters and I are the miracles that survived living in that home.  Indeed our lives are sometimes complicated and messy...but we are here!  Fighting to have what we want and desperately wanting to live authentically.  Using our past to propel us towards our futures.  Finding no shame in the home we came from and using our testimonies to encourage someone else…even ourselves…every now and then.   

I had had enough.  After a few drive-bys and before folks became suspicious of my circling the block staring at this house, I put the car in drive.  I took a deep cleansing breath, tossed my iPhone in the backseat, turned the radio up and drove away from that home.  I turned the corner satisfied with the journey thus far that led me to come back full circle.  I wiped the tears from my eyes and chose to dismiss the sadness that usually comes with tears and instead rejoiced for the journey thus far.  See...I was headed back to the home I have created for myself far, far, far away from the home I once knew.  And I was comforted right in that moment knowing we can always go home.  Thank GOD for that.

*Head Up.  Shoulders Back.  Face to the Sun*      

Them Against Him??? Please!

"Scandalous Thursdays!"

"Hi!  My name is Faith Margaret and I watch Scandal."  I enjoy it.  Thoroughly…and will blog  right here about all new episodes on Thursday nights beginning next week.  Oh!  Your theories about what is happening next in this suspenseful show are welcomed along with my musings.

Debbie Allen with all her sass directed tonight’s episode.  I can just see her stomping around  the set snapping her fingers and barking orders when this episode was being shot.  Norm Nixon’s wife rarely disappoints, baby!  Remember her scene from the movie, Fame?  "You want fame?  Well, fame costs.  And right here is where you start paying.  With sweat!"  Where is Leroy, by the way?!?  That boy could f l y!  I digress...

“Captain Ballard!” to you, buddy cuz you don’t know him like that!  At least not anymore now that he has fallen under the spell of THE Olivia Pope.  The POTUS is not his friend but his nemesis so let’s move on and don’t interrupt him talking to his "girlfriend."  Yeah.  Right.    Olivia is a playa from the Himalayas!  *said just like Jeromey Rome from Martin "Look at the white shoes, look at the white shoes!"*  Olivia reminds her "boyfriend" that they “stand in the sun” and not creep in the shadows like she did with Fitz.  He's in.    

Finally those B6-13 files that old loser David Rosen didn’t know what to do with can be put to use.  David.  David.  David.  You have everything at your fingertips with the B6-13 files and you failed to capitalize on all that goodness.  Now you get to punch in as an “On Call Gladiator” and do the good work.  Gather all that information together and call for a tribunal to get Command out of being in command.  Yeah!  That sounds like a plan...

“Toot toot!  Heyyyy, beep beep!”  We miss you, Donna Summer! 

Elizabeth North is the female head of the Republican National Party and now she is being spied upon, like she doesn’t know her slick and sly ways with Cyrus’ boy toy is dirty, dirty, dirty.  Yassssss, Olivia you do not have to be friends with everyone you work with to do your job on their behalf brilliantly.  Wish I would have learned that lesson early in my career.  Dang!  

He.  Ain't.  Nothin'.  To.  Play.  With.  

Whoever writes for Command aka Daddy Pope must really enjoy figuring out what his next read will be!  He has THE best lines with so many hidden messages behind what he says that teeters along historically racial lines with every utterance.  Pay close attention, folks.  “Jake is not family.  You may love these boys, Olivia…but they are not your family.  After they’ve enjoyed the spoils they will move on.”  Mmmm hmmmm, he might be disgusting (in a really understandable way, I might add…kinda like Tony Soprano) but he is still your father, Olivia and indeed he will always be your family.  “You will always have a place at my table.  I will always be there.  Waiting.  For you."  Ain't that the story of black folks about black folks that are rejected by other folks?  Message.

How did I miss that the California cat that saved Mellie from killing herself and her daughter caught her on her knees before is now the VP?!?  Where the hell is mean old Sally Langston, anyways?  Anyways.  Nothing like the man you secretly covet nearly getting his head blown off to make your nature rise, huh?  “That bomb went off and I woke up.  My body woke up.”  *pant pant*  Having one’s shirt ripped open in a consenting lustful encounter is hot like fire, baby!  Saddle up, cowgirl!  That red bra is a good look, Mellie girl.  Getting your groove on in the White House has to be mind blowing.  Who could resist that opportunity if it presented itself?!?  I mean, not saying that I would but I would understand if YOU would…

Notice how Olivia is always positioned in between Fitz and Jake?  And her outfit is black and white when she is in scene with them?  

You know, I don’t think Olivia wants Fitz or Jake.  I think she really wants her father.  Her daddy.  What every little girl wants all of her life.  A father and a daddy that loves her unconditionally and keeps all the monsters away from her bedside at night.  A father and a daddy that teaches her to make good decisions and prides himself in the woman she has become because of his guidance.  A father and a daddy that keeps not one secret from her and is her biggest and loudest fan.  Not any other man on the planet earth can beat a father and daddy in praising her, so she knows all of her worth.  Because she doesn’t have that kind of father and daddy she continues to choose the Fitzs' of the world and toys with the Jakes' of the world.  She needs a damn father and daddy!

Somebody finally told the makeup artists that Cyrus’ new hair looked ridiculous and we are back to him looking like an over-aged politician.  I can take him more seriously now.  Maybe that was the point with that ridiculous makeover?  Cyrus is asking Olivia for help against her client who is trying to blackmail him by teasing him with that hot boy toy.  He paying rent for dudes not?!?  *tsk tsk tsk & utter look of disgust on my face*  Cyrus is off his game.  Lost his political wit.  Olivia to the rescue!  Throw old girl off and give your old friend, Cyrus a chance to get himself together.  Uh oh.  Boy toy really digs Cyrus?  Yuck.  

“OWWWW!  Oooo, my honey!  You got me working day and night!”  

We love you, Michael Jackson!  *chair dancing*

Awwwww…Huck and his son playing together at Pope & Associates.  That is the storyline I have been waiting for season after season after season.  “Do you have a work related request for me?” is code for “Get the hell outta my business, heiffa!”  Leave that man alone and let him have a little big of happy.  After all the brainwashing and torture and killing, he deserves some happy. 

Clearly the boys can’t handle this thing without fighting back and forth like little boys on a school yard vying to play with the shiny red truck.  It is best for Olivia to handle this her way.  Call your father and cry.  Get him to be daddy.  Handle it.  Duh.  

The VP is screwing the Elizabeth chick and giving Mellie the biz’ness, too...like right after the other?  He prolly still has Mellie’s scent on him, too!  Ewwwwwww!  He.  Nasty.  Quinn shows up as annoying as ever and helps Huck piece together what is really going on.  Huck uses those B6-13 skills and sends that pock-faced cat to meet his maker all while Javie watches with his ice cream cone in hand.  Damn.  Damn.  Damn.  

Dinner with dad and Olivia is wearing the white coat.   You know what that means!  She is ready to do the right thing at the right time for the right reason.  Or so she thinks.  It’s time for Command aka Daddy Pope to confess his flaws as a father and daddy to Olivia and let Olivia know what he really wanted for her.  He moves closer to her.  Mmmm hmmmm…he is on to her and her plan with “them.”  Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you another read by Command aka Daddy Pope aka Bad Mutha…shut yo' mouth!

He Just Wants To Be Her Father Daddy...

“You have forsaken me.  Your father.  Your family.  You wanted to stand in the sun in the bright white light.  It blinded you. Those uh, people that you’ve chosen over me?  You do not see who they are.  What they want.  How they see you.  Those people are not your people.  They never will be and you will never be one of them.  You know what they would have done to me.  What they always do to people like me.  A trial.  An execution.  You were going to let them do that to me.  After all I’ve done to protect you from them.  I tried, Olivia.  I tried my best.  For the first time in your life you are on your own.  You think the world is so terrible with me in it?  Wait ‘til you see what it’s like without me.“  Did you catch alllll of that?!?

And dammit, there ain’t s*#! in those boxes at all.  Nothing.  Loser David Rosen loses.  Again!

Somebody give Debbie Allen her Wonder Woman Cape RIGHT DAMN NOW!

Until next week, gladiators!  It’s been a long time since I have said that!!!! 

  

Three Against One

"Scandalous Thursdays!"

"Hi!  My name is Faith Margaret and I watch Scandal."  I enjoy it.  Thoroughly…and will blog  right here about all new episodes on Thursday nights beginning next week.  Oh!  Your theories about what is happening next in this suspenseful show are welcomed along with my musings.

Where’s my inspiration?!? *arms flailing in the air*  I started the recap last night but closed my MacBook Pro 15 minutes in when I realized I just might be, prolly am, is it possible…a bit over the love affair between Olivia and Fitz.  The passion that initially fueled their love affair has now been replaced with desperation and boredom and it’s time for them to put closure on this thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah…it was inevitable.  *sigh* 

While I am a bit fascinated at the lengths a man hopelessly in love will go to just to have what he wants, Fitz is a bit…pitiful these days.  Not attractive at all.   The amount of game Olivia has thrown into the ring right about now is damn bold.  She has what he wants.  He has what she wants.  The only thing standing between them is that irreplaceable, undeniable, amazing, God created gem bestowed only upon women that causes men (and women) to lose their righteous mind!  Try as she might, Olivia is still susceptible to their forbidden love affair, though.  That carnal flame they have still flickers even in the darkest hour.  And can be manipulated to a bright, warm flame with a few choice words whispered over the phone, a vivid imagination, subtle sighs and complete comfort exploring one’s own body.  “And then what?”    

We get to see more of Abby aka Red aka O-Wishia’s backstory.  Her ex-husband who is the POTUS’ guy for senator caused her great physical and emotional pain behind closed doors when they were married.  Remember Olivia rescued her back then by delivering a few swift blows to that cat’s knee caps and giving O-Wishia a safe place to stay.  Once again O-Wishia is a crumpled and emotional mess, left hiding under her desk frazzled and terrified out of her mind.  But still wanting to do the job she was hired to do!  Bless her heart.  We know who our friends are when push comes to shove and Olivia rescues her with that bad white coat (look for it at The Limited in coming months…last week’s black and white coat is there for $250) and not 1 but 2 choices of a dress to change into.  Always prepared!  Olivia knows good and well what O-Wishia wants and will absolutely make it happen.  That’s a friend, baby! 

I sooooo want Huck to find some normalcy in his life and watching him play videos with his baby is just too sweet.  This might just be the most brave thing Huck has ever done and he’s damn B6-13!  Not letting anything keep him from his child.  *message*  He lost his nerve…Huck who kills at will and stuffs all of that emotion far, far away.  But his baby boy found his way back to his Daddy because that’s what children do.

The music is back while THE Olivia of seasons past makes a reappearance to ignite a fledgling senate campaign to protect O-Wishia.  “I’m every woman. It’s all in me.  Anything you want done baby, I’ll do it naturally!”  I promise I play this song by Chaka as loud as I can whenever I need a pick me up and courage to be the woman I am was born to be.  Finger snapping, hips swaying and singing at the top of my lungs until I  believe again, “I’M EVERY WOMAN!”  It works every single time…

Cyrus and his boy toy doesn’t do anything for me and his being so careless with details of his work is crazy, right?  He is on to a possible leak though.  I still am not quite sure how Ellen’s wife fits into all of this other than she wants to grab some power on the hill.  Mellie doesn’t need anyone to help her figure out how to involve herself in matters of the Presidency.  She helped fix an election for goodness sakes!

David Rosen is the on call staff at Pope & Associates and he is called as needed.  He pretends he ain’t interested in the least but gets involved every single time.  I do believe he wants very much to be on the right side of the law and stay ethical in his dealing but you gotta wonder…is that possible in the highest reaches of the American government.  Doubtful.  Now the new love triangle will be O-Wishia and the Vice President’s former campaign manager (what’s his name?) and poor, poor David?  Blah.   

Tom has to be the coolest Secret Service Agent, ever!  “You.  Are.  Beautiful.”  Do all men fall under the spell of Olivia when they have a chance to rest their gaze upon the beauty and power of her being?  Maybe it’s because they want a taste of what captivates the man Olivia welcomes into her complicated life, heart and bed?  Do they want to feel that all encompassing, breathtaking, reckless kind of love a man shares in common with Olivia?  Fascinating.  Just like Olivia, I want to believe that Daddy Pope exists and he is not Command all the damn time.  Tom doesn’t think so.  He feels quite clear Command is Command is Command all the time.  Period.  Comparing Command to a god?  Well.  Damn. 

Another Daddy/Daughter Chat…it’s been too long!  “You DO NOT disrespect me, ever!  Do you understand?”  Oh, Lawd Jesus she done made Daddy Pope aka Command mad!  *biting my nails*  He reminds Olivia she is never ever to choose “one of them” over him, ever and he won’t have it.  He gives her a warning that he is intentional and precise in how he handles his biz’ness, she can’t possible win when he’s in the game and it’s in her best interest to not try him.  He scary.  Fine, then!  Olivia gathers herself and gets Tom shanked in jail.  Just like good old Daddy would do.  She manages to get her 2 lovers in the same room and considering joining her in bringing down Command.  Pimpin.  Pimpin.  Pimpin. 

Where the hell is Mama Pope?!?  It’s time for her to make an entrance.  Let’s end this season with a bang, Shonda girl!   

Side note:  I am still waiting for Pope & Associates to hire someone else.  And I wouldn’t be pissy at all if Quinn was relieved of her duties.  Still not feeling her.

Side note to the side note:  Sarah Palin could have used Olivia Pope on her campaign.  An adorable, bright, cute, snaggled tooth, fluffy bunny slipper wearing little girl convincing adults to vote for her Mommy?!?  Hell, the Democrats could have used Olivia Pope this week!  I’m just saying…

"Girl, We Getting' Old!"

"Girl, we ain't old!  Stop saying that!"  That's what my friend of 30 years tells me every single solitary time I remind her that indeed, we are growing old.  That conversation usually follows some long night of partying or dranking.  Like your girl Beyonce said, "I been drankin'!  I been drankin'!"  *hiccup*  And baby, we are feeing it the next day!  Eyes blood shot red with that puffiness surrounding them that just won't go away like it used to.  Where are my damn shades?!?  Knees aching and hips so sore from attempts to twerk and drop it that you're popping Alleve pills left and right.  Voice scratchy leaving you sounding like a damn man the next morning.  And right when you think you are ready to crawl out of bed and get your day started you shake your head and think to yourself, "Girl, you too damn old for this!"

Let the record show, I like to turn up (will we EVER retire that phrase) as much as the next 40 plus woman.  But!  The more I turn up these days, the more I am reminded my turn up knob has to be adjusted to accommodate the age factor.  I get these subtle reminders here and there that I am growing older, too.  Tell me this hasn't happened to you:  You are just about to share your next thought with someone and it just straight evaporates from your mind.  Like a little wispy cloud blown away by a cool summer's breeze.  WHAT IN THE ENTIRE HELL?!?  Add that to the natural decline of your physical abilities, one can't help but wonder how this whole growing older thing is going to happen to us.  So now you think maybe instead of turning up to 10, you can have just as much fun at 7.

The good news is there is still plenty more life to live…fully…and I am excited for the next half of my life.  I want to do this aging thing with style, grace and without complaint.  Instead of life happening around me or to me, the goal is to be a more active participant in life and fully explore the miracle of being right her on this earth just one more day.  I want to...  

• Age gracefully and be completely washed over with that older, confident, sexy woman swag that just seeps from my pores

• Age gracefully and not be burdened with health issues that limit my freedom.  Nothing a little bit of yoga or Pilates and time in the steam room can't knock out

• Age gracefully and have learned a few lessons along the way to be able to share some of that wisdom with the younger folks

• Age gracefully and have a fully stocked kitchen complete with a perfect bottle of wine to accompany a delicious meal I can throw together when friends just happen to stop by for a spell

• Age gracefully and feel absolutely free with no self imposed limitations and a healthy disregard for others opinions and the impossible

The possibilities are endless for how to age gracefully and I imagine I will add to my list every now and then.  Increasing my quality of life while aging gracefully!  So, yeah…we gettin' old.  But we look damn good doing it, too!  Mmmkay?!?  TURN DOWN FOR WHAT? !?  *adjusting the knob to 7*

Power Of The...

"Scandalous Thursdays!"

"Hi!  My name is Faith Margaret and I watch Scandal."  I enjoy it.  Thoroughly…and will blog  right here about all new episodes on Thursday nights beginning next week.  Oh!  Your theories about what is happening next in this suspenseful show are welcomed along with my musings.

“Heyyyyyyy…” *snapping my fingers* Is that Ron Isley?!?  “Summer breeze makes me feel fine blowing through the jasmine in my mind…”  I promise whenever the episodes begin with a little soul singing we are typically in for a good time.  Fingers, legs and eyes crossed, yes? Dream interpretation is an amazing thing, especially when your two lovers and your daddy are in your dream or nightmare!  Anybody know where that lovely duvet on Olivia’s bed came from?  Better yet, where can I get that black and white coat Olivia has synched so tightly around her waist?  F l y. 

Cyrus with his boy toy again.  Like, literally boy toy.  He wants to take care of his new project that is claiming to be without a father.  He has to know better.  I am still trying to figure out the role of Ellen’s wife besides her wanting to bring Cyrus down for some reason. 

Now O-Wishia aka Red aka Gabby but is really Abby has resumed the role of being a friend to Olivia because they connected over Olivia crying over a man.  Ain’t that the way?  And the POTUS entertains 1 minute too long of his conversation with her and allows her to tell him that he should tell the woman he loves that the man she is having hot, lusty sex with is alive?!?  Please. 

It’s nice to see Huck having a little bit of fun instead of being the tortured soul he always seems to be.  And we know why.  He is playing video games online with his little guy.  That’s sweet.  And kinda creepy.  Parents, pay attention to what your babies are doing online.  Anyways, this could be a really interesting story line…

So Mellie has found a mentor of sorts in an old First Lady that schools her on how to be powerful behind the most powerful man in the world.  I am not quite sure I can imagine Michelle going for drinks with Hilary or Laura, though.  Looks like Mellie is back in the game, baby!  Perfectly coiffed hair and perfectly tailored blue dress and all.

Command is a bad, bad man...

While I appreciate the lesson on the unfair characterization of women as “bitches” when we are direct, assertive and clear, it was a bit…forced.  Try again next week, writers.

Jake and Olivia still don’t make a believable couple to me.  He is the consolation prize for her because she can’t have the grand prize.  Fitz!  I mean really…Olivia doesn’t even know anything about where Jake comes from or his family that lives in some Midwest town.  Jake and Olivia’s love affair is as much a fantasy as their sordid involvement with the POTUS.  “I want you to know that not choosing me is okay.”  Damn.

  

So, Command grew up in Detroit, huh?  Figured!  He shows up at the White House to collect his dog, Jake from the POTUS after said dog strayed and now he wants to discipline said dog properly.  The POTUS and Command are now on the same team?  Of course!  Jake is their common foe and they can bond around their disdain for him.  I wonder which of the two dislikes Jake the most?  Command likely will never care for any man that attempts to love Olivia but now he finds POTUS to be useful.  “Stay focused.  Do what needs to be done.  Don’t be swayed by anyone. Give her what she wants.  Satisfy her then do what needs to be done.  Stay objective.  Stay clear.  Don’t let love cloud your judgment.”  Damn!  We all could use a little Command in our lives when we are wrestling with love and relationships, huh? 

Command leaves the POTUS and makes his way to Jake to give him some straightenin’.   It is like he has to have this confrontation with the men in Olivia’s life.  He made a good point though about how arrogance and the need to swagger can deter men from what they could have.  Being the master manipulator he is, Command plays with your mind until you are utterly confused about what is really goings on.  So now Olivia has to save Jake and by taunting her love box in front of Fitz she just may have accomplished her mission.  Silly man.  “You may be Command, dad but I have weapons at my disposal.  Weapons you cant possibly posses.”  Well alright now, girlfriend!

Side note:  They need to replace Harrison like yesterday.  The 2 team gladiator force is not doing it for me.  Side note to the side note:  3 more episodes left and neither  Shonda nor Debbie Allen are writing or directing any of them.  Another sigh.  

5 Things I Know For Sure This Month...

When I turned 40 years old, babyyyy…you couldn't tell me NOTHING!  *dusting my shoulder off*  The dreading turning 40 vibe missed me by miles and instead I was overcome with feeling myself for turning 40.  In my mind turning 40 was an indicator that I was "'sho 'nuff grown."  This wave of liberation literally washed over me and I fully committed myself to only doing what Faith Margaret wanted to do and not feeling obligated to justify my decision making around not doing what I don't want to do.  Dammit!  Head up.  Shoulders Back.  Face to the sun! 

This summer I celebrated my 44th birthday and though I still feel liberated, I also feel w a y more conscious of my aging.  I am very clear that I am walking in the second half of my life and I want very much to live the rest of my life fully and authentically.  So much so that I am looking for little life lessons in the daytime with a flashlight with the well intended purpose of thriving over the next 44 years.  October is just about over and left me with a few lessons to add to my authentic living:    

1.  The more I know and the more I plan, the less I worry.  Worrying is a habit I learned as a little one to cope with a dysfunctional childhood.  Worrying doesn't serve me well as an adult and it's my life's work to rid myself of this burden.  *sigh*  Life happened this month and I was reminded of how much better I feel when I learn more about a thing that is worrying me and when I am proactive.  End result is I am w a y less worried.            

2.  A watched pot never boils.  I can be impatient with life and want things to move according to my plan.  Accepting that I cannot control everything around me and there is grace is being able to yet enjoy my journey while waiting for this thing or that thing to come

A little reflection is a good thing...

to fruition is a gift.   Hurry up and wait, basically!

3.  Just because they ask for it, doesn't mean they will use it.  It is an honor for our friends to come to us asking for feedback and it's our duty to give them our honest perspective about their situation.  And that is where it ends.  Period.  Our friends are not obligated to take our feedback and run with it.  Though we may be right as rain, standing firmly beside our friends as they find their way through life's challenges is the task.  Speak your peace and hush!

4.  Every 90 days…refresh!  I go to work sick, tired and otherwise worn out more often than not.  I accumulate vacation day after vacation day and sick day after sick day because I show up at 8:30am Monday through Friday, come what may.  I get the work done and stay on task with work projects because I am always on the grind BUT I am pretty sure I am not my best self (at home or at the j-o-b) when I work with no rest.  I am starting to feel the benefits of taking time off every 90 days and I love it!  I feel better.  I look better.  I show up better.   

5.  It will be there tomorrow.  I am a task master and love a good, "To Do List" to get me through all the things I believe are necessary to keep my life running efficiently.  But, dammit…if it doesn't get done today it will be there tomorrow.  On that damn To Do List.  Waiting for me to check it off.  And that is just fine.  Damn!  Forgot to add something to the list...

November is right around the corner with it's brisk mornings and cold nights (and high a!$ heating bills).  In between layering on sweaters, zipping up boots and fixing scarves just so, there are plenty life lessons waiting for us.  What 5 things will you know for sure next month?